How Does Being Convicted as a Mother Affect Your Parenting Journey?

Every morning, I have the wonderful opportunity to read my devotional book, The Great Awakening by Jackie Hill Perry. Today, on Day 15, I felt particularly convicted as she spoke about the importance of our words: what we say, how we say it, where we say it, and to whom we say it.

Reflecting on my past, I remember being a younger version of myself, thinking I knew exactly what I wanted, who I wanted, and how I wanted my life to unfold. However, I didn’t fully understand that I lacked the best examples to strive for something better. As a result, I limited my expectations, wants, and needs because I grew up amidst inconsistency and abandonment. Yes, I had a village, but that village wasn’t fully equipped. They only knew what they had been taught, and the cycle continued.

My village consisted of nurturing women who gave limitlessly because that was all they knew. They encouraged goals like going to college and getting a good job, but who had the money for that? They also advised independence: don’t depend on anyone but yourself.

As a mother now, I take every free second to educate myself about my future and my son's future. I strive to be Supermom by watching different podcasts, reading numerous articles, and researching careers to prepare us for the future. I’ve cast aside my pride to ask questions, instead of keeping to myself to maintain privacy. Life is hard, but it becomes even harder when you lower your own value.

Understanding that I was chosen to be my son’s mom drives me every day to become the best one in the world. Though I once thought I wouldn’t mind being a single mom, today I do mind. Because back then, it was all about me. Now, it’s about Ermias, someone who genuinely needs both parents.

In due season, everything will come together.

From this blog, I hope you take away the importance of learning and growing. I’m learning to trust God’s plan without questioning it. I’m learning not to judge others but to see their hearts. Once again, I felt convicted and reminded of these truths.